“life will be better in spring”

April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 February 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 January 2012



I just wanna apologise for those harsh words i said. I wanted to see if you could tolerate with my stupid attitude BUT instead you already replaced me with another girl which is obviously way more prettier than me and everyone knows it. You can continue with her but im just here to apologise and to thank you for every single thing. Even if you've cheated on me, lied and play ard with my feelings, your still the best thing i ever had. I'll never forget you and yr charming smile. Take care dude. :')

What have i done? Why i cant get my happiness? Issit so hard? When am i gonna see that there's gonna be that one guy thay will love me with all his heart. Show me love, care &concern. I've always been getting heartbreakers. I just want my happiness. Thats all ;( there's this one GUY. The only guy that have made me into a strong lover. To still love and hold on no matter how bad the situation is. We just can't let go of each other. It is super hard. His the first guy that made my dreams came true. Yes..... But it was all in the starting.... Its all now vanished. Everything changed because he became into a guy which love to lie. But still i forgived him in everything. He would just do anything to make me forgive him. But, as days past by. I realised how bad is his attitude. He would lie, beg for forgiveness like fck. But would repeat the old same mistake all over again. Sooo after that it was a cycle of lies then. I just endure endure and endure. Then there is one day that really made me realised that i was just a fool all along. He made me like a fool. Yup his own girlfriend as a fool. I started to read and listen to motivations about love. I decided not to give him the love that i always do. It was okay first.... But even if i changed to the bad side, he didnt realised. He always say he regret regret regret. But nehh. I always have been sacrifising for him ALOT. He just dont realised that i would do anything to help him. Thr was once, i went out in the morning to help him abt smtg and be with him. I got home..... Sooo i was being beaten by my dad. I told him. He didnt ask me whether im alright or not. He didnt ask me if it was pain and whr thr pain is..... Urgh fck it. Everythings in a mess. Im falling out of love. I have to let go even if it hurts. For my ownself. Not to always give face and get myself hurt again. But his the best damn thing that i ever love. His the best i swear. But you changed. I can't do anything to make you change even if i tried SO MANY TIMES, but i fail.... Again and again.





I always get jealous seeing other guys could do anything for their girlfriends even also when they did not do any mistakes but to make sure that the guy meets the girl. To be cautious all the time. To be patient and give love even if the girl is being ego. To never watch the girl cry over him. Would make anything just to see the girl happy.

Labels: FYM FCK YOUR MUM

Im currently in school and im in good terms with boyfriend. Like seriously in good terms. We are going on smoothly like last time. I like it, cause its already starting of school. And i hope there won't be any problems come along. Cause n levels and prelims are coming up and i have to seriously get my ass of studying. August 15 is our 1st anniversary but im having prelims. Been wondering where to go. Im tight in cash right now. My dad doesn't drive his taxi anymore. Uhhhhmmmm. Its time to save up some money in the bank.

Labels: Show me the way

I wanna leave. But im scared to see him with someone new. That is my biggest fear. I hate myself for loving you.



Aku cemburu. Cemburu tengok orang nye relationship happy!!! :( Okay fvck it. It seems like im the only one compromising in this whole bloody relationship. You? Uhm, you just do your job by doing things that will disappoint me, sweet talk, plan something for us and that's it. Your effort all ends there. While me? Im always here missing our old times, go out and spend time together. When the day we did not meet for 5 days, you didn't have the initiative to like meet me alone and spend time together. You met your friends and do your nonsensical stuffs first and meet me. It really proves alot lah. Now, i don't wanna be 'too' serious in this relationship. If one fine day you come to me and ask me why i've changed. Im gonna answer, 'ask yourself'. I wanna change to see you change. To see if you are there, always wanting to be with me. Its all not about the presence, its about the love. I don't mind that much if you don't show you love me infront of your friends that much. But to me, i just want to feel being pampered. Feel like someone really loves me. Not someone that loves me whole heartedly just after a big fight. Its all the thought that matters the most. I still love you tho it hurts. Do you even care if im down? Oh well, maybe your just used to see me down.





I misssssssss you faizal :(



Faizal, i don't expect a perfect relationship. But you see we're really on the rock. We still don't understand each other. But maybe i understand you but you don't understand me. I know you want things to go on your way. Sometimes when i given in, and you see i would do anything for you. When i say anything, i would. Mark my words. Stole money just to cab to your house early in the morning just because i miss you and i want you to be with you. Sometimes people tend to do whatever they can. But for me, its not that expect so much from you. But at least some effort to show that you love and miss me too. I know you miss me. When you said you miss sleeping with me. Your imagining im beside you, i not stupid i know you want me to come. I have to slowly put a stop by pampering you too much. Me, as a human also wants to feel the pamper by her love. I want it. I've always been waiting for the day which you will not really 'forget' about your friends and concentrate on me. I have to admit, i got jealous when 'some' of my friends boyfriend would do anything for their love ones. I know you wouldnt wanna lose your friends again like last time. But hey, now they also have their girlfriends to pay attention on. Not only you. If you are their friend, you would understand whatever situation they are in. When your friends are with their girlfriends. Where were you? Your at home, thinking about them, you want them to be like last time. Me, as a girlfriend i gave you advises. But deep down, im sad. Seriously sad. When are you gonna go to tampines 'just to meet me' excluding your friends. I know you want to. But when all of your friends aren't here, your mood went down in the drain. You said its gonna be boring. Your talking to me, and you said that, what would i extremely feel? I feel useless and like you don't prioritise me like how i prioritise you. If just one fine day, im not there by your side anymore, i hope you'll have this in your mind set, 'damn, amira really did sacrifise for me alot, she's always been there for me no matter what' Even if you cheat behind my back, lie to me because of your friends, i would never fail to turn to you and even  your friends which is also my friends. I don't know if your gonna understand what im tryna imply right now, but i miss you so much <3 :(



i want a guy who pampers me. whom is afraid of losing me. a guy that compliment me eventough i said i looked ugly. i want a guy whom isnt embarrased of my flaws. i want a guy who always say sweet qoutes. tell everyone that im his and tells that im the girl for him and prove ppl that his willing to do anything for the girl. hold my waist while walking together. isnt embarrased of holding hands infront of crowds. would do anything to make me happy.

Labels: Jerk

It faded but i dunnoe why im crying.

Jealous siaaaaaa tgk sweet couple. How their boyfriends compliment them in every way. Invite them to do something happening and stuffs. ARGHHH

Why am i feeling so sucky? AKU MACAM NAK MATAE BARU AH SIA!