“life will be better in spring”

April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 February 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 January 2012

Faizal, i don't expect a perfect relationship. But you see we're really on the rock. We still don't understand each other. But maybe i understand you but you don't understand me. I know you want things to go on your way. Sometimes when i given in, and you see i would do anything for you. When i say anything, i would. Mark my words. Stole money just to cab to your house early in the morning just because i miss you and i want you to be with you. Sometimes people tend to do whatever they can. But for me, its not that expect so much from you. But at least some effort to show that you love and miss me too. I know you miss me. When you said you miss sleeping with me. Your imagining im beside you, i not stupid i know you want me to come. I have to slowly put a stop by pampering you too much. Me, as a human also wants to feel the pamper by her love. I want it. I've always been waiting for the day which you will not really 'forget' about your friends and concentrate on me. I have to admit, i got jealous when 'some' of my friends boyfriend would do anything for their love ones. I know you wouldnt wanna lose your friends again like last time. But hey, now they also have their girlfriends to pay attention on. Not only you. If you are their friend, you would understand whatever situation they are in. When your friends are with their girlfriends. Where were you? Your at home, thinking about them, you want them to be like last time. Me, as a girlfriend i gave you advises. But deep down, im sad. Seriously sad. When are you gonna go to tampines 'just to meet me' excluding your friends. I know you want to. But when all of your friends aren't here, your mood went down in the drain. You said its gonna be boring. Your talking to me, and you said that, what would i extremely feel? I feel useless and like you don't prioritise me like how i prioritise you. If just one fine day, im not there by your side anymore, i hope you'll have this in your mind set, 'damn, amira really did sacrifise for me alot, she's always been there for me no matter what' Even if you cheat behind my back, lie to me because of your friends, i would never fail to turn to you and even  your friends which is also my friends. I don't know if your gonna understand what im tryna imply right now, but i miss you so much <3 :(